I Suck.

I was reading Chuck Lorre (Yes, I am clearly obsessed by this man-which in itself is weird for a past her if ever prime and a les-bo-heim to boot)and he wrote an article entitled:
HOW TO CREATE A HIT SITCOM
A simple, step-by-step guide to prime time success.
It is, as you might imagine if you watch his shows, is funny.
But mostly what it made me realize is that I am a spectacular failure. I have one person following my blog, and I am pretty sure it is someone I am paying. I do not make any money as a writer, mostly cuz I refuse to call myself such or even show anyone my writing. I think having a highly commented on rant on fb is writing. Clearly, I am a v-e-r-y slow learner. I like to write. I like to write about what I think about things. There is not a lot of money in that- no wait, I think there is; I just dont know how to, as we like to say now, monetize it. I am not very motivated to succeed. What's up with that?
As it says in my copy of The Underachiever's Manifesto (yes it does exist and I wish I had written it, but I was too underachieving to do so)
GOOD ENOUGH IS GOOD ENOUGH. Actually it doesn't say that but that is the essence of the 10 points.
I would reprint the ten, but I will leave it to the next post. See if anyone reads this, of if it is, as I suspect, a very cheap form of self-therapy.
Enjoy this day after the second Inauguration of the first Black President (see it was not a mistake!)

New Year's Day 2013

Interesting to watch people celebrate their New Year's Eve in this time of the social media blitz. In the olden days, you would just wait for a phone call or to run into someone to ask them what they did. In this moment in time I can know what you are doing in this moment of time. So, I have a list of pictures of happy, well dressed "friends" enjoying their evening. This does not make me feel any better about myself. I spent my night in raggedy clothes (yes, J. Crew makes awesome lounging gear-but how to justify spending bucks on something I will just stain and nobody will see?) watching fabulous people doing fabulous things. Kissing their true love (or love of the moment) at midnight. Me, not even so much. I blazed through the hour watching Holly Hunter in mid-80's confusion about having it all, and by all I mean integrity, a career and a man.
I have it all. And by all I mean, none of the above. I have life and for that I am grateful. I think. Yes, Yes, I am cuz most humans fight to stay alive and I am not that different from most humans. A grinchful Happy New Year to both of my dear readers.

Assisted Living (Help me Chuck Lorre!)

I saw the note by blogger telling me to list people in my post, so I thought who better than the Jeffe of TV comedy, Chuck Lorre. I do not know him, or imagine that I ever will. We are in parallel worlds. He is famous, I am not. He makes people laugh: I make people cry. He lives in LA; I live in LA (and by that I mean, the LA he lives in is on 90210, the LA I live in is on COPS). But we do share a heritage, and a love of numbers (see his Vanity Card archives---see my unread blog posts 1-56). Plus if I tag him in my post then maybe someone will read them.
Of late I have not felt much humor in my situation. For those of you who can not be bothered reading "TDT/Assisted Living" from the beginning, I will surmise: Long time, past her prime,dyke inherits aging (82 at time, now 90)father (hereto referred to as: The Old Guy) and hilarity ensues.
Like I said, I have not been feeling the hilarity. Its a lot of work caring for others. And I don't mean in the "write a check to the charity" kind of care. Perhaps it is the reason I never had children or men have wives; it is HARD. Still, its best to find some humor in some corner or instead of hilarity, insanity will ensue. So now I laugh at myself. How crazy am I who thinks I can get him to remember something just seen 10 minutes ago? That is bend over chuckle worthy! I am just nuttier than those kids on Happy Endings or New Girl. And they are kooky, weird funny! Yup, 61, tattooed and still wearing high tops. Crazy!
Happy 2nd of 3 New Year's (not the one that you eat apples and honey and then fast, not the one that you eat whole fish and blow things up, but the one that you get falling down drunk and watch some 7000 pound "ball" fall off a building).

Assisted Living-So you wanna help...

UPDATE Transportation problems solved!
The several agencies that help individuals with transportation each have their own set of rules. Each agency contracts with separate private companies to accomplish this mandate. And so if one agency only takes people in a designated zone, they can't pick up in another zone. In order to facilitate the Ol' Guy to the 2x a week Adult Day Care (the wonderful One Generation-send donations or volunteer there), we have to use two agencies. After a surprisingly short wait time, I have a standing order for both directions. What I love about this arrangement is that I don't have to drive and I don't have to ask for favors from others! I was very lucky and had a good friend helping out, but really one can ask so much from non-relatives.
Take away:

If you are a friend of a caregiver and want to help, offer to help decipher the bureaucracy of the various agencies. That is the real work that will last long after you grow weary of driving

Bingo bootie

The senior day care hands out prizes to the bingo winners. Usually I send them back to be re won. But finally a prize that came in useful! The kids loved the checkers game for at least an hour of fun on thanksgiving!

Assisted living. No rest for the caregiver

I know, most people think: "old person sits around,you get their money and live the good life". And I won't lie to you: he does sit around and I do get the money and if by good life you mean I have good but modest housing and get to eat $11 burgers, wellbthen its true. But you think being a parent is difficult, just try taking care of oneThis week the challenge was to get one of the 3 or 4 agencies that provide transport for elders to pick him up and return him at 3:30 to the home. Seems simple enough. Unless you live I one district and the daycare is in another. Teeth gnashed.
The next new subject I am studying. Is respite care. More soon on that.
My AM before work : laundry, four meals - 2 to go: vacuum,
My PM after work: pick up RX mess, shop TJ 's.

Assisted Living Part...oh who knows?

So. (have you noticed all kinds of people are using this small word to begin their explanations- not just ner do wells like me who have been using the word since 1974), I repeat, So, I have been busy living life and waiting for another funny bon-mot to be created by the Ol' guy and myself. Now that I have you suspended in space, I don't really have one. It's just more of the same "shampoo, rinse, repeat" or for those of you who don't follow my skewed brain functions: "say something, repeat, say it again, repeat, no, I did tell you, yes you have heard this before, now why would I lie to you?, repeat, bang your head against the wall, and hope that someone loves you-or at least is getting paid-when you do the same thing in the very soon future...."
I went traveling this past weekend. Alone this time. Although, leaving him at home involves preparation also. I had to get away; there are lives at stake!
Off to celebrate life and aging in Seattle. But isn't it funny, or in this case ironic, that I go to see and connect with many friends from the past, and on the first night I loose my voice! For those of you who know me, well, I am assuming that is everyone, or why are you reading-unless its that person whom I am sending checks to... you know that I love to talk. I love to tell stories, make non-sequitur jokes (see above), pithy comments, snide remarks. Apparently not this weekend. Still, I had a great time using my newly found listening skills.
That's it. Gotta run.
Oh, vote. No let me be more specific, Vote Obama.

Sunny October Day at Foxglove Guest House, Seattle, Wa